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Post by thelampincident on May 28, 2011 0:19:46 GMT -5
yeah I'll keep it relegated to here from now on
Because drunk is bro
And funk is ho
funkin' honuts in yo dunkin donuts
FUCK I WANT TO SHOVE A RAKE HANDLE UP MY OWN ASS AND DECLARE IT A NATIONAL HOLIDAY JUST LIKE JESUS SHOPS ON THE DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING FOR A PAIR OF STYLISH NEW SLACKS DAY
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Post by thelampincident on May 28, 2011 0:21:17 GMT -5
Have you bathed in the broth of a duck's testicular sweat lately? iT'S As refreshing as a sauna dip on a cold summer dusk dawnlight after you've fallen victim to a butt
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Post by thelampincident on May 28, 2011 0:32:36 GMT -5
If there weren't non-drinking admins and mods here, I'd propose that your blood alcohol content has to be up to a certain level before posting here.
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Post by hipsterchainsaw on May 29, 2011 9:59:53 GMT -5
this is recess dude! the kids can act how they will, the mods and admins are here to make sure it doesn't get out of hand. don't throw wood chips!
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Post by thelampincident on May 29, 2011 13:03:01 GMT -5
I spent last night in Pawcatuck and wrote a whole bunch of profane haikus on a paper bag last night.
I have a feeling one of them is going to be used for a David Carradine song in the future.
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Post by hipsterchainsaw on May 29, 2011 19:28:19 GMT -5
that rules! hype for their split w/ exogorth.
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Post by thiswineisold on May 29, 2011 20:31:17 GMT -5
i'm helping my platonic life partner shave his balls right now. well, more like telling him how not to get ingrown hairs. i don't even shave my junk. i did work in a porn store, though.
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Post by thelampincident on May 29, 2011 20:54:17 GMT -5
that rules! hype for their split w/ exogorth. I just heard a new recording last night... it's harsh and hell and sounds great. Prepare!
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Post by manticoreisthebastard on May 30, 2011 0:03:07 GMT -5
I'll throw wood chips at all you suckas!
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Post by hipsterchainsaw on May 30, 2011 1:15:58 GMT -5
that rules! hype for their split w/ exogorth. it's harsh, sounds great!
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Post by thelampincident on May 30, 2011 1:49:09 GMT -5
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Post by thelampincident on May 30, 2011 2:03:41 GMT -5
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Post by hipsterchainsaw on Jun 1, 2011 7:24:49 GMT -5
man if you make a thread, while drunk of threads your like because they're the result of other threads you like, total paradox.
however, i got some beers so i'm going to drink them later, and post here around, 1 a.m. eastern standard time. (give or take one or two hours)
edit: later post, blunts > beers all day.
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Post by thelampincident on Jun 4, 2011 23:16:33 GMT -5
The Bruins just did the dumbest flub ever. Losing a game 11 seconds into overtime. What the fuck is that shit.
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Post by thelampincident on Jun 4, 2011 23:27:24 GMT -5
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Post by thelampincident on Jun 4, 2011 23:37:37 GMT -5
i did work in a platonic life partner's balls
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Post by thelampincident on Jun 4, 2011 23:45:51 GMT -5
my platonic life partner did work in a porn store, though.
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Post by thelampincident on Jun 4, 2011 23:53:07 GMT -5
i'm helping my porn store shave his platonic life partner. i don't even shave my own porn store. i did work in an ingrown hair's junk, though.
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Post by flesheater on Jun 5, 2011 0:32:59 GMT -5
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Post by thiswineisold on Jun 5, 2011 0:39:41 GMT -5
i did work in a platonic life partner's balls yeh that one time he jizzed in my face was awkward to say the least
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Post by thiswineisold on Jun 5, 2011 0:42:43 GMT -5
i dumped my dude via text message before i went to seattle for a week because he keeps telling people he'd like me more if i dressed better. also he failed to give me morning sex the day i left. who the hell gets out of bed with a raging boner and just puts on their pants
grounds for termination
well, i think he's coming over after he gets off work at 7am
haven't seen him in over a week, so if he doesn't put out im done for real this time
what im saying is i better see some balls
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Post by thiswineisold on Jun 5, 2011 0:45:02 GMT -5
i cant believe i havent cheated on him or slept with anyone else
well except that one time i almost did
and those two times i made out with my friend
anyway it's time to simulate procreation
the gaping maw calls hungrily
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Post by thelampincident on Jun 5, 2011 0:45:55 GMT -5
One of the ladies I have been with asked me to jizz on her face one time. I wasn't fast enough.
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Post by thelampincident on Jun 5, 2011 0:52:57 GMT -5
I shouldn't be posting this shit on the Internet but hell, it's not like I have any manners around women anymore anyway, so fuck it.
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Post by thelampincident on Jun 5, 2011 0:55:17 GMT -5
I would like to go back to Daytona Beach again just so I can have my picture taken with Crotchduster in front of the Down With The Clown head shop. Yes, that REALLY exists.
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